EXCEPTIONAL LIVING

Being an amazing couple requires a good memory more than a toolbox of great skills…

Remember you two are in love…

Remember you two care about each other…

Remember you two can stand together and take on the world…

Remember you two are a team…

Remember you two share your most intimate feelings…

Remember you two enjoy being silly together…

Remember you two have fun together...

Remember you two can find times to be mischievous...Remember you two are awesome friends…

These helped bring you together… Remembering them will help keep you together…

You are the perfect fit for your perfect relationship. 

Changing yourself to force a fit into a relationship works only for a while. Your truth will not be hidden for long with out demanding attention. Be YOU, it is the greatest gift you can give someone else.



Written by Kenny Brixey

MARRIED OR NOT. YOU SHOULD READ THIS...

“When I got home that night as my wife served dinner, I held her hand and said, I’ve got something to tell you. She sat down and ate quietly. Again I observed the hurt in her eyes.

Suddenly I didn’t know how to open my mouth. But I had to let her know what I was thinking. I want a divorce. I raised the topic calmly. She didn’t seem to be annoyed by my words, instead she asked me softly, why?

I avoided her question. This made her angry. She threw away the chopsticks and shouted at me, you are not a man! That night, we didn’t talk to each other. She was weeping. I knew she wanted to find out what had happened to our marriage. But I could hardly give her a satisfactory answer; she had lost my heart to Jane. I didn’t love her anymore. I just pitied her!

With a deep sense of guilt, I drafted a divorce agreement which stated that she could own our house, our car, and 30% stake of my company. She glanced at it and then tore it into pieces. The woman who had spent ten years of her life with me had become a stranger. I felt sorry for her wasted time, resources and energy but I could not take back what I had said for I loved Jane so dearly. Finally she cried loudly in front of me, which was what I had expected to see. To me her cry was actually a kind of release. The idea of divorce which had obsessed me for several weeks seemed to be firmer and clearer now. 

The next day, I came back home very late and found her writing something at the table. I didn’t have supper but went straight to sleep and fell asleep very fast because I was tired after an eventful day with Jane. When I woke up, she was still there at the table writing. I just did not care so I turned over and was asleep again.

In the morning she presented her divorce conditions: she didn’t want anything from me, but needed a month’s notice before the divorce. She requested that in that one month we both struggle to live as normal a life as possible. Her reasons were simple: our son had his exams in a month’s time and she didn’t want to disrupt him with our broken marriage.

This was agreeable to me. But she had something more, she asked me to recall how I had carried her into out bridal room on our wedding day. She requested that every day for the month’s duration I carry her out of our bedroom to the front door ever morning. I thought she was going crazy. Just to make our last days together bearable I accepted her odd request.

I told Jane about my wife’s divorce conditions. . She laughed loudly and thought it was absurd. No matter what tricks she applies, she has to face the divorce, she said scornfully.

My wife and I hadn’t had any body contact since my divorce intention was explicitly expressed. So when I carried her out on the first day, we both appeared clumsy. Our son clapped behind us, daddy is holding mommy in his arms. His words brought me a sense of pain. From the bedroom to the sitting room, then to the door, I walked over ten meters with her in my arms. She closed her eyes and said softly; don’t tell our son about the divorce. I nodded, feeling somewhat upset. I put her down outside the door. She went to wait for the bus to work. I drove alone to the office.

On the second day, both of us acted much more easily. She leaned on my chest. I could smell the fragrance of her blouse. I realized that I hadn’t looked at this woman carefully for a long time. I realized she was not young any more. There were fine wrinkles on her face, her hair was graying! Our marriage had taken its toll on her. For a minute I wondered what I had done to her.

On the fourth day, when I lifted her up, I felt a sense of intimacy returning. This was the woman who had given ten years of her life to me. On the fifth and sixth day, I realized that our sense of intimacy was growing again. I didn’t tell Jane about this. It became easier to carry her as the month slipped by. Perhaps the everyday workout made me stronger.

She was choosing what to wear one morning. She tried on quite a few dresses but could not find a suitable one. Then she sighed, all my dresses have grown bigger. I suddenly realized that she had grown so thin, that was the reason why I could carry her more easily.

Suddenly it hit me… she had buried so much pain and bitterness in her heart. Subconsciously I reached out and touched her head.


Our son came in at the moment and said, Dad, it’s time to carry mom out. To him, seeing his father carrying his mother out had become an essential part of his life. My wife gestured to our son to come closer and hugged him tightly. I turned my face away because I was afraid I might change my mind at this last minute. I then held her in my arms, walking from the bedroom, through the sitting room, to the hallway. Her hand surrounded my neck softly and naturally. I held her body tightly; it was just like our wedding day.

But her much lighter weight made me sad. On the last day, when I held her in my arms I could hardly move a step. Our son had gone to school. I held her tightly and said, I hadn’t noticed that our life lacked intimacy. I drove to office…. jumped out of the car swiftly without locking the door. I was afraid any delay would make me change my mind…I walked upstairs. Jane opened the door and I said to her, Sorry, Jane, I do not want the divorce anymore.

She looked at me, astonished, and then touched my forehead. Do you have a fever? She said. I moved her hand off my head. Sorry, Jane, I said, I won’t divorce. My marriage life was boring probably because she and I didn’t value the details of our lives, not because we didn’t love each other anymore. Now I realize that since I carried her into my home on our wedding day I am supposed to hold her until death do us apart. Jane seemed to suddenly wake up. She gave me a loud slap and then slammed the door and burst into tears. I walked downstairs and drove away. At the floral shop on the way, I ordered a bouquet of flowers for my wife. The salesgirl asked me what to write on the card. I smiled and wrote, I’ll carry you out every morning until death do us apart.

That evening I arrived home, flowers in my hands, a smile on my face, I run up stairs, only to find my wife in the bed - dead. My wife had been fighting CANCER for months and I was so busy with Jane to even notice. She knew that she would die soon and she wanted to save me from the whatever negative reaction from our son, in case we push through with the divorce.— At least, in the eyes of our son—- I’m a loving husband….

The small details of your lives are what really matter in a relationship. It is not the mansion, the car, property, the money in the bank. These create an environment conducive for happiness but cannot give happiness in themselves.

So find time to be your spouse’s friend and do those little things for each other that build intimacy. Do have a real happy marriage!

If you don’t share this, nothing will happen to you.

If you do, you just might save a marriage. Many of life’s failures are people who did not realize how close they were to success when they gave up.”

A MAN WORTH WAITING

How would you describe the ideal man? Tall?dark?handsome?? Too often a guy may satisfy your eyesight, but leave your heart empty and still longing. Remember after a few years that tall,dark,and handsome guy can be transformed into a pale, bald guy with bifocals on those gorgeous eyes.


-A Man worth waiting for-

1. Puts the needs of others ahead of his own.

This man accepts people just the way they are, loving others even when his love is not returned. He will continue to love someone because of his commitment to that person, not because of how he feels. (Philippians 2:3-4)

2. Rejoices in his relationship with Christ.

You don’t have to ask this man if he is a Christian. His joy in the LORD is evident in his life. (John 15:11)

3. Maintains proper relationships.

This man seeks a good relationship with everyone—from his friends to his parents. He listens to differing perspectives without feeling threatened. He has strength to back off from a fight. He works to forgive wrongs done to him and seeks to make his own offenses right. He will not hold a grudge. (Hebrews 12:14)

4. Refuses to jump ahead of God’s timing.

He is not so eager to do something that he cannot wait on God’s timing. He chooses against impulsiveness so he may be in the exact center of God’s will. (Psalms 37:7)

5. Seeks to meet the practical needs of others.

He is not so self-absorbed that he cannot make time for the needy. (Ephesians 4:32)

6. Stands for what is right.

He hates anything contrary to God’s holy character. He is known as a man of integrity. (Romans 2:9-10)

7. Follows through on his God-given responsibilities.

He uses the talents God has given him and realizes that “he + Jesus = adequacy for any God-given job.” He is neither overconfident nor absorbed with feelings of inferiority. He is not a dreamer, wishing for more ability, but a diligent steward of the talents he has been given. This man is dependable and stays with even a difficult task until it is completed. (I Corinthians 4:2)

8. Understands the importance of feelings and emotions.

Some woman may find themselves attracted to a demanding man, assuming that his dominance will be their security. Other women may marry a doormat they can dominate, but inevitably end up despising the man’s weakness. A gentle man is the best of both; he takes initiative to lead but tempers it with gentle responses toward the other’s feelings. (Colossians 3:12)

9. Flees temptations to compromise.

This man refuses to be in situations that are sensual, immoral, or impure. He does not entertain friendships that lead to drunkenness and carousing. He avoids talk that could cause strife or jealousy. This man does not allow a temper to control him or anger to destroy him. (Proverbs 25:28)

*These qualities are not UNREALISTIC IDEAS (as some may believe). When a man follows Jesus, the Holy Spirit works these into his life. Galatians 5:22-23 But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, forbearance, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, 23 gentleness and self-control. Against such things there is no law.



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See if this list contains any of the qualities you are looking for in a man.

1. Spirit- controlled Christian (Eph 5:18)

2. Jesus is #1 in his life, not just an ornament (Mark 12:30)

3. Broken; understands how to rely totally upon Jesus. (Philippians 4:13)

4. Ministry-minded; wherever he is,he is available (I Cor 4:2)

5. Motivator; man of vision, concerned about lost souls. (Rom 10:14)

6. Sensitive spirit; in tune to the needs of others (Gal 6:2)

7. Understands the awesome responsibility of a husband to his wife (Eph 5: 25-31)

8. Humble enough to be a disciple (teachable)and able to disciple others (Matt 28: 19-20)

9. Man of prayer; he knows the key to success is his private time with God (Col 4:2)

10. Family man; he desires to have a children and raise them properly for God’s glory. (Prov 22:6)

All of us are at differing levels of maturity. As some may say, a REAL MAN ("tunay na lalaki") does not really exist, it's just GIRL'S ILLUSION and FAIRYTALE. But, a MAN OF GOD really do exist. A man of God who works toward being conformed to the character of Christ.

Do you want to marry a Boaz? Then set your standards high. To be married to a man who loves the Lord and wants to serve Him is one of life’s highest privileges. It is worth whatever wait, whatever cost. Don’t settle for less than God’s best.


---Ms. Happiness---